Thursday, January 22, 2009

Long time ago stuff

January is almost over, which means more and more people are piping up to say they are all of 32 seconds pregnant. I hate the Happy Valley baby booms.

On December 11th 2005 I popped my last birth control pill. Jack and I had been married a whopping 2 months and I figured we were both "ready" and "mature enough" to be parents. I wanted a baby so bad. Jack was going to be such a good Dad. We were living in Ephraim at the time. In a 2 bedroom apartment that we paid a whopping $385 dollars a month (that seems so cheap to me). I was working for my Dad from home, Jack was going to school full time. I thought it was perfect timing. On December 12th I was sure I was pregnant. Because that's how it works right? Actually I've been pretty sure I was pregnant everyday for the past 3 years. Everytime I felt sick or my stomach twitched I was sure I should start buying baby stuff.

3 years later it's still just me and Jack.

We've been to the dr.'s, started fertility drugs, tried all sorts of home remedies, researched everything from vitamins to the best adoption agencies. It still makes me sad when I see people getting pregnant and having babies.

I want to be a mommy.

13 comments:

The Steiner's said...

Hey Daynalee--
I feel for you. It is a little hard. All these people getting pregnant here and there like it is not hard to do. And then there are us the little people that aren't so lucky. I hope that you dream to be a mom comes true.

Oh by the way if you don't know who I am, My name is Dusti, I was in the same ward as Jack in Roosevelt.

Fitzgerald Family said...

What do the doctors say. Is there a way that they can help you. I sure hope so, I know that you will make a good mom. I know that bonnie davies had a hard time and they never said it would happen and it did, So maybe there is a little one just waiting for you. Let me know if you need anything. I am not sure how to help or what to do, but I hope you the best and hopefully the doctors can help you. I know that a girl here couldnt get pregnant and they went and took the egg and sperm and implated them and she had twins... I dont know what options they have told you but maybe something like that is in your future. Hope things go well... Let me know, I wish i could do something.

Dana Kay Wilkerson said...

Dayna,
I am so sorry you feel that way! i wish you could have a baby! i'm always afraid i'm pregnant already lol. I like it just being Todd and I. i'm sure someday i'll get to the same point as you.

Zack & Keri said...

Hey Dayna, I'm so sorry that you haven't been able to get pregnant. I hope the doctors can help you find out why. You're such a sweetheart, I know you'll be an awesome mom when if finally happens for you. Good Luck!

Esther Attridge said...

I'm sorry to hear about the prego troubles. It can be such a rough time. But I am glad that we found eachother's blogs! I just thought you might wanna know that Stephanie has a blog too http://thosecrazybirds.blogspot.com a bunch of our other cousins have blogs too - but you could get them from mine if you so desire!

Rhonda said...

Hey Dayna:
I'm sure that you don't know who I am. I actually used to work for your grandpa and coached the cheerleaders several years ago so I know who you and your cute family are. I'm totally a blog stalker and it's the only way I feel connected to "home" but I read your entry and wanted to comment. My mom tried to get pregnant with me for 7 years and I know that it must be very hard to want something and not get it right away. Everything always happens for a reason and I'm sure you've heard that already but when the timing is perfect I know it will happen for you. I think you are an amazing person and I'm glad that I stumbled across your blog. :)

Trent and Melanie said...

amen sista... I totally feel the same! Trent and I want a baby sooo incredibly much and it makes it that much harder when others just seem to pop them out like tictacs. Or someone says anything to you about how difficult it is to get pregnant and you ask how long they've been trying and it's been like four or five months... your like HELLO! Try 3-6 years and you'll have something to complain about! We'll get there. You and me! If you find anything great that's working let me know and I'll do the same for you. Maybe invitro is our next option?? I love ya and Heavenly Father loves you... we'll all get through it together!

Kristin said...

I remember the days of not taking Aleve, Nyquil or anything else, making sure the shower wasn't too hot, trying not to lift anything that would cause a strain, etc., etc. It's a relief to not have to worry about it anymore. It doesn't mean that I don't have regrets over not having a biological child, but it's much less stressful not think about it anymore. And I wouldn't trade Baylie for any other baby on the planet - even one from my own womb. Let yourself have your sad moments, but don't let them get the best of you.

suelyn w said...

1st - I want some of those cute blocks you did on craft day. 2nd I sure hope that your week went better last week then it started out. It sounds like it couldn't have gotten much worse. 3rd - I can't even image the heartache, stress, etc. that comes along with wanting a baby so bad and not being able to get pregnant. My heart truly aches for you. I have no doubt though that someday you will be a mother and when that time comes, you'll be an awesome mother, and going through this trial will make you all the more better of a person & parent (could that be possible?).

Kenna said...

Sigh, even though I am in the same boat with you, I can't find the right words.

3 years and still just me and J.

Please, text, call, let's get some Cafe Rio, and you can talk it all out. Sometimes it helps.

I can be your shrink for less. I don't charge that much, I will just make you be my friend.

Joan said...

Sweetie, Heavenly Father has a plan for you. he doesn't give us things on our time he does it at the right time. I know you have been beating yourself up about this, but trust him. The little sweet soul that you are suppose to parent is not ready to come down to you yet. I believe that he/she has already chosen you and Jack and will come to you one way or another on the Lord's time, which again is the right time. I love you soooo much, and it hurts me to know that you are suffering like this! please call me anytime or pray just please don't let it depress you. It is not your fault, you haven't done anything wrong. Trust him.

Spend this time strengthening your faith and your relationship with your husband. I believe these two things are the most important foundations for a couple before they have children. I look up to you both for having such a strong testimony and relationship but why not put in 110%, there is always room to improve. Just foccus on these for now, the baby will come in the Lord's time.

I Love You,

DeLoy and Heidi Brady said...

Dayna, I am so sorry that you are experiencing this trial. I don't quite understand it, but I do know that prayer and faith help in these things, and I will pray for you guys. I truly am sorry, because I think that you would be a totally awesome mom.

Eric and Caralee said...

Chubby, you are definately in my prayers. You will be an awesome Mother, it will happen don't worry!