Thursday, December 20, 2012

Christmas Letter 2012

We are really having to rush this year’s letter to press, what with the end of the world coming on the 21st. We really thought we had dodged a bullet when the world didn’t end twice already this year and thought maybe we could get away without a letter at all. It turns out that crazy old people are often crazy.

This year just really hasn’t been nearly as eventful as 2011 was for us. We didn’t buy a new house this year, or a new car, and despite Dayna letting the dang dog run away a couple times, she always brought that dang dog back, so no new dog either. That’s good though, because Anne is adorable. We call our “Dogter.” That’s how cool we are. Let that sink in.

Dayna was able to buddy up to the primary presidency in our ward and get them to release her. Once word of her craftiness, they decided to put her in a law of consecration calling where she makes free cute stuff for the relief society. Jack got released from the Cub Scouts through a series of menacing looks at short bishops and a serious case of being afraid of bears, which has crippled his ability to camp.

Bear related fear did not, however, cripple Jack’s ability to write things he doesn’t get paid for. Three times in the past year, Jack has had articles selected and published by, Utah’s biggest website in the world. This has led to Jack being a huge celebrity around the house, sometimes polling as high as 50% among registered Anne-dogs.

Speaking of celebrity fame, Dayna, famed reader of both Twilight and The Hunger Games, had another extremely successful round of craft sellery at the annual Holly Fair. Bored women herded in droves to waste their husbands’ money invest in high quality goods hand crafted by Dayna. Hopefully we can use that money to finish our basement so we don’t have to be so close together and be forced to listen to each other’s lame jokes as often.

A bit more about the basement. If you haven’t seen it, it is 4000 square feet, has a theater room already in place, and a segmented glass area where the tile is ready for the pool. It’s also in Florida, and we both have nicely tanned six packs. Dayna teaches baby aerobics and Jack plays for the Heat. It is fun in our basement.
Back in reality, our basement is coming along nicely. We have the framing and electric work completely done, and the sheetrock is almost completely started as well. Once it’s done, we really do want to get a theater room setup with a projector. Next, we’ll save up for a psychiatrist who can help treat our ADD so we can both sit through an entire movie. These are the problems you have to deal with when growing up in America.

We both like our jobs very much. So much in fact that neither of us decided to even get raises or promoted, that’s how dedicated we are. We celebrated our 7th anniversary this year, which means if you’re one of our grandparents reading this, you’ve been mathematically eliminated from being in your thirties.

To experience the true romance in our lives after seven years, we traveled to Tooele, Utah, where we toured—as a symbol of our relationship-- an actual shut-down asylum. The asylum, confirmed as actually haunted by the very respectable and trustworthy (read: sarcasm at full) folks over at “Ghost Hunters,” was a great time. I guess we also ate a fancy meal and stayed at a nice hotel, but we really just wanted to keep the description limited to the romantic notion of being trapped in a building with insane people. That resonates with these authors for some reason.

Each year we write down a few little anecdotes, but it doesn’t really matter if we have cool things to brag about or if we just distract you from our glaring flaws. We’re glad to have each other, and also to glad to have those of you reading this in our lives. And were also really glad that most of you are reading it electronically because, let’s be honest, you’re probably not worth the production cost of a printed letter, picture, envelope and a stamp, are you? We’d probably forget to send you one anyway, and that would just be awkward later on.

Merry Christmas you nobodies!
Jack and Dayna Ady